The Science of Rediscovering Play: Why I Finally Listened to My 8-Year-Old Self

 


For a long time, I lived by a very specific, practical logic. I told myself that "art is not lucrative." 

Like so many of us, I pushed my childhood loves into a quiet corner so I could focus on the "productive" world of the sciences, technical writing, and librarianship. I traded my watercolor palettes for document control logs and bibliographic data.

I convinced myself that being an adult meant outgrowing the "frivolous." But recently, I realized that suppressing those interests didn't make me more productive—it just made me more disconnected.

The "Lucrative" Lie

We are often pushed toward the sciences or technical fields because they offer a clear path and a steady "ROI" (Return on Investment). In my case, this led to a successful career, but it left my inner child—the one who wanted to capture the world in ink and color—waiting at the door for decades.

When I finally started my "re-journey" back to art and calligraphy, I wasn't just picking up a hobby. I was performing a rescue mission.

Why "Soul Searching" is Adult Comfort

As an adult in my 40s, I’ve learned that soul searching isn't just about looking forward; it’s about looking back with compassion. When we revisit what we loved as children, we aren't being "unproductive." We are comforting a part of ourselves that was told its passions didn't matter because they didn't have a price tag.

Soul searching helps us realize that:

  • Art and Science can coexist. My precision as a technical editor actually feeds the discipline I need for calligraphy.

  • Play is a necessity. Allowing myself to be "bad" at watercolor is the ultimate comfort for an inner child who was always told to be perfect and professional.

  • Purpose is holistic. You aren't just your job title. You are the sum of everything you’ve ever loved.

Finding the Way Back

In my workbook, "Finding My Purpose," I included specific sections to help you dig through the layers of "adulting" we’ve built up. I share exercises that help you identify what you loved before the world told you what was lucrative.

If you’ve spent years in the sciences, or any field that demanded you leave your creativity behind, know that those colors are still waiting for you. You don’t have to choose between being a professional and being a dreamer. You just have to give yourself permission to play again.

"I spent years thinking my love for art was a distraction from my 'real' career. Now, I realize it was the fuel I was missing. Have you ever suppressed a hobby because it wasn't 'productive' enough? Let’s talk about it in the comments. 🎨✨ #FindingMyPurpose #InnerChildWork #ArtistRejourney"

Here is my affiliate link for  "Finding my Purpose: a Soul Searching Workbook": https://amzn.to/3QeAmKG


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